headabovelaundry

Three kids, two dogs, one husband…keeping my head above the laundry pile one load at a time…

Who’s On First

on May 9, 2012

I’m in a bit of a bad mood this week. I’m in a bit of a funk.  And it’s things like this that just push my “irritation quotient” a bit too high: 

6. Obsessions— Be it a clean house, germ phobia, paranoia, hoarding, eating, or even exercising.  The rituals we obsess about will bump our husbands from their rightful spot as first on the priority list. Identify it, and seek professional help.

This blog post was a Top Ten list of ways to push your husband away.  It’s from a blog I subscribed to because it provides some thought-provoking and insightful messages.  Sometimes.  A bit too religious for my taste, but I use a filter and pick and choose what works for me.  Sometimes I take away some positive things.  Other times, it makes my blood boil.

Today it made my blood boil.  My husband’s rightful spot is first on my priority list?  Really?  First?

Maybe my blood is boiling because this is the second time this week that I’ve read something that says because I am a wife and mother, I should come last.  This particular post says my husband should come first and foremost in my life.  A few days ago I read a blog post that said as a mother, I should set aside my wants and needs to focus on my children.  That they are my sole reason for being.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and my children.  I do.  But the fact that I should spend my time putting all of them first and foremost in my life is wrong.  Just wrong.  There has to be a healthy balance.  And this is not healthy.  At least not in my eyes.  I think in order to be at least an adequate wife and mother, I need to focus on myself a bit, too.  I think my sanity should be first and foremost.  Because a sane, happy woman is a better wife and mother.  I’ll make myself (more of) a crazed lunatic by putting everyone’s needs ahead of my own.

Maybe I’m just a self-centered woman.  I sure hope not.

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2 responses to “Who’s On First

  1. outlawmama says:

    Hell to the no. I hate the message about who belongs where. Nobody’s damn business.

  2. I agreeeeeee – I’m a crazy lady with self-care, I’d hate to see me without it! More is better for me and my loved ones. Here’s to some radical self-care for all of us!

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